you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
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