the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
i think im in europe. pls send help
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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