i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize