He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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