HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
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