So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
