Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
