Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Randomize
