At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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