You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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