He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
