his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
