the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Randomize
