You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
