All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
time to smoke my breakfast
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize
