I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
