you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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