i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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