i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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