I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Randomize
