And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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