And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
zippers are such a cool invention
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
