so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I think my moral compass just broke
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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