do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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