my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
