I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
