Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
