Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Randomize
