you traded sex for a burrito?
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Randomize
