Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Randomize
