Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
