Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
