They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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