i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
