I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
