Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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