Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
being pregnant is like rehab
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I just want nice things and good sex
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
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