Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Randomize
