You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
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