spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Randomize
