if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
FUCK WHALES
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
