I feel like abortions should bother me more
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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