i don't like sucking hair
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
