Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Randomize
