Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
