just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
