i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Randomize
