I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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