my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
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