i don't like sucking hair
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
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