can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
